Hey, at least I'm not rioting

Well, the holiday was a resounding success. Everything went to plan and we both had a wonderful time. I'll come to that in a later blog though as I'm intending to briefly review all the places we went.

Coming back from the holiday was, in contrast, hard and unpleasant. We were both depressed for a couple of days and very glad that we had Friday, Saturday, and Sunday to recover and prepare ourselves for the real world. Fortunately, by Sunday we were both feeling in better spirits and managed to double-team the housework so we at least have some clothes and a house that smells less like cat poo (despite my brother's best efforts while he house-sat for us, the cats had been relentless in their quest for world domination by fecal overload).

The events of this morning however, have left me in no doubt that I'm yet to fully re-integrate myself back into normal life:

After a few hours of fitful sleep peppered with horrid dreams, I woke up around 5:30am to the sound of a running engine outside. Somehow, my addled brain decided that something was afoot and I became convinced there were people downstairs. After a few minutes of careful listening, I decided it was just the cats and went back to sleep. The paranoia however, stayed with me.

Following several iterations of the alarm, hit snooze button, sleep for 7 minutes cycle, I eventually dragged myself out of bed at 8:15 and started to prepare breakfast. Just as I was laying my breakfast out on the table, I saw my car drive away from the front of the house!

In a slightly fuzzy panic, I ran outside and watched the car disappear from the bottom of the road and turn on to the main road at some speed. I immediately went back inside, grabbed my mobile and dialled 999:

Hello, which emergency service, please?


Hello, police. What is the emergency?

I've just witnessed my car being stolen!

Ok, as it's a crime in process, we'll get officers to you immediately.

The lady on the phone took my address and car details and a brief description of what happened.

Towards the end of the conversation, I idly walked to the other side of the road and looked around me.

There, at the end of the road, was my car!

The drive home from my parents' last night came flooding back along with the memory that I'd been unable to park outside the house because my usual space was taken. By a neighbour. With a car that is the same colour as mine. And a similar shape.

Um, sorry, stop where you are. I've just seen my car.

You mean they've driven back?!

Um, no, I'm an idiot. Our neighbour has a car that is very similar to mine and they parked outside my house last night. It was their car I saw drive off just now.

(suppressing a sigh) Ok, sir. Not to worry. If you're sure your car is ok, I'll cancel the car that was coming to you.

I'm pretty sure she took it in good humour and I'm amazed she didn't sound annoyed!. So yeah. That brief period of madness pretty much sums up my state of mind today. In fact, I'm not even 100% convinced it really happened.

I went back to my (now cold) breakfast and ate as I pondered exactly which parts of my brain I'd left behind during our holiday and in which countr(y|ies).

Here's to a good night's sleep tonight and the resumption of business as usual in the brain department!

Tags: blog